Grace

This morning our Sunday School class was discussing prayer and the power it has in our lives.  We were kind of flying by the seat of our pants because our regular leader was out of town and our substitute was having a rough morning so we were all just sharing stories of how we have seen God's hand at work.  My friend Amanda and I both shared of our daughter's births and the complications that followed.  After the class we were talking and she brought up the fact that she can't tell her daughter's story without tearing up and how she was a bit amazed that even five years removed the same applied to me.  No one would ever guess that this little girl...

began life like this...

Grace was born at 26wks 2days and weighed only 2.7lbs.  She was delivered at a hospital that was not equipped to handle her needs so she was transported to a Level 3 NICU by ambulance.  Unfortunately, during transit she experienced both a grade III and a grade IV intraventricular hemorrhage (brain bleed). Grade IV is the worst and after the head ultrasound was complete the outlook we were given was bleak.  I remember telling my mom that I wished I drank because I could sure use a margarita.  It sounds funny now but I just wanted to check out, leave that moment, wake up from the bad dream. 

We were told that she might never walk, that she might never talk, that she most likely would have cerebral palsy, that she might be blind, that she might be deaf...the list goes on and on.  Most women dream of the day that they have their own child to hold and love on.  The dream never goes like that.  So I grieved the loss of the dream but I never doubted the goodness of God.  I never asked why, because in all fairness why not?  At least the hubs and I had a relationship with the Lord and where surrounded by prayer.  I can't even fathom going through that without His love.  

 

Grace's passage Psalm 71:5-8 became a comfort to us all and still rings true today.  "For thou art my hope O Lord God, thou art my trust from my youth.  By thee have I been held up from the womb, thou art He that took me from my mother's bowels, my praise shall be continually of thee.  I am a wonder unto many but thou art my strong refuge.  Let my mouth be filled with thy praise and thy honor all the day." 

Grace came home after 66 days in the NICU, exactly one month before her original due date.  We were told to expect therapy to be needed until she was at least 3yrs old perhaps much longer.  She was discharged from physical therapy at 18months and speech therapy by the time she was 2.  She has eagle eyes and hears EVERYTHING.  She has not had any problems since being discharged and that can only be attributed to one thing, God's GRACE.

I was talking with my husband when we got home from church, explaining the conversation that took place, and I told him "You know what, I hope that I can't ever tell Grace's story without tearing up.  I don't ever want to become desensitized to what could have been.  And because of God's grace what is."